Dec 062014
 

Monkey Spanker Vibro

Pros:
– Compact and travel friendly
– Can be used solo or with a partner
Cons:
– Lack of material information
– Everything about the bullet
– Cheaply made
– Requires a lot of lube
– Lacking stimulation
Overall:

1star

Monkey Spanker Vibro - Full image with bullet

-About the Monkey Spanker-

The Monkey Spanker Vibro is a vibrating stroking toy that can be used for solo pleasure or with a partner.  Unlike many other masturbation toys, the thin design takes up minimal space, making it easy to use during oral and penetrative sex.  The slim design also makes it lightweight, so it’s easy to use without becoming fatigued.  The include bullet is removable, so you can hand it over to your partner and use the stroker without vibration to share in some mutual masturbation.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - use

The Monkey Spanker Vibro has a plastic handle (which sandwiches the material of the ring), but the company is very unclear about the material of the super soft gel pad.  The included paperwork calls it “high-tech medical grade material”, the website says it’s “a highly specialised medical grade real feel™ material and has been designed to emulate the softness of a woman”, but no where does it say just what the material actually is.  It has a slight smell, but not overwhelming.  I’m assuming based on other products I own, that it’s a TPR/TPE type of material – but don’t take my word on that.  All I can say is that it’s not silicone, and I don’t believe it can be sterilized (just clean with soap and water or a sex toy cleaner).  The paperwork says to always used a water-based lube, and because the material type is unclear, I wouldn’t recommend trying another type.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - material flexibility The plastic is firm, but the ring is very soft and stretchy.  The max diameter of the ring is 1 7/8″, so if you’re above average in girth, you might discover this is too small to work with your body.  The company suggests using it just under the head of the penis, but even then, it might be too small depending on your anatomy.

The material is lightly tacky and picks up a lot of lint.  It’s important to wipe/wash the toy before use to remove the particles it’s collected.  It’s also very important to use lubricant with this toy because it does have an issue with grabbing and dragging across the skin if not.  The rings around the circle don’t add any extra stimulation, it doesn’t feel ribbed or textured in any way during use.

The shape of the stroker is really nice and very easy to hold.  The ergonomic designs effortlessly fits in your hand to provide you with the most comfort (whether you’re pleasuring your partner, or yourself).  The top of the toy has the company name and logo, and the back is where the bullet is inserted.  Because the bullet is inserted lengthwise into the hole, it’s mostly out of the way and only sticks out slightly.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - front and back

Monkey Spanker Vibro - with bullet insideThe included vibrator requires three watch batteries, and the Monkey Spanker Vibro comes with six.  The bullet is extremely basic and only has one function.  The button on the end turns the toy on to the one vibration setting, and turns it off.  There are no patters, no increasing levels of power; just one setting.  This is fine for some, but might be too basic for others.  The power is very buzzy and light, and doesn’t travel well to the ring.  The only positive thing about this, is that the vibrations are very quiet.  So quiet, you might get away with masturbating with someone in the same room without them knowing.

The size is easily the greatest feature of this product.  The compact size makes it less overwhelming for a beginner, doesn’t take up much space to store, and is much more suitable for travel than most strokers.  The total length is 6 1/4″ and the thickness is a measly 1/2″ including the bullet.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - size comparison to hand

Monkey Spanker Vibro - packaging Monkey Spanker Vibro - full contentsThe Monkey Spanker Vibro arrives in a plastic package that’s very attention grabbing.  Nothing about it is discreet; from the colors, to the text, to the diagram on the back.  The plastic has to be cut open, so you’ll need to find an alternative storage option.  The paperwork provides you with most of the information you need to know (apart from material type), but it’s marketed strongly as a hetero man’s product.  Naturally, anyone with a penis can use this product, but the information between the website and package may bother some.

-What we liked-

The size of the product is really great.  It was easy for us to toss into his nightstand drawer without taking up much space, and it was easy for both of us to hold.  The diameter of the ring was fine for my husband (his girth is average) which was something we were concerned about before use.  It’s very soft and much more stretchy than you had assumed, which was appreciated.

When I was using it on my husband, I didn’t get as fatigued as I typically do with masturbation sleeves.  Because it’s so lightweight, I was able to use it for much longer before handing it back for him to use.  It also wasn’t awkward during oral sex since it didn’t get in the way of my lips (though tasting the lube wasn’t the most enjoyable).

-What we didn’t like-

Monkey Spanker Vibro - bad batteryI was pleased to see the Monkey Spanker Vibro came with the proper batteries, because I don’t always have watch batteries laying around.  What I didn’t appreciate, was the fact that half of them weren’t good.  They didn’t have an expiration date on them, but they clearly couldn’t be used.  This was quite frustrating, though I suppose they didn’t have to include batteries at all.  I just know I would have been extremely disappointed had I purchased this stroker only to find out half the batteries were useless.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - poor qualityThe quality is poor.  Yes, the stroker is fairly affordable and that’s wonderful, but the highly specialised medical grade real feel™ material had deformities on the bottom of the ring, and chunks removed around the perimeter of the toy (on top of it being a little messy on the plastic portion).  I’m not sure how long the stroker will last given the deformities, but it’s disappointing when you open a brand new product and see so many issues.

Monkey Spanker Vibro - bullet size comparisonThe included bullet is really cheap and fits very tightly in the handle.  It’s a struggle to remove, and I know it won’t be long before the button gets broken off because of the design.  Most bullets are easily replaced, but if we wanted to replace this one because it’s too basic, too weak/buzzy, or because it breaks, it would be a challenge.  This bullet is much smaller than standard sizes and won’t be as easy to replace.

We half anticipated the stroker would work like a squeegee with lube, but it didn’t.  Even still, it required a lot of lube and it turned into quite a mess by the time we were finished.  It was excessive and seemed like a waste compared to the pleasure this product provides.

My husband used this while we masturbated together and I used it on him during oral sex and in place of a handjob.  No matter how we used it, he didn’t find it to be stimulating.  Vibrating products are usually too much for him, but this was just the opposite.  He could hardly feel the vibrations and didn’t feel like the thin product stimulated enough of his penis at once.  He was already hard, horny, and ready to go before we started using it.  We tried using it in a quick motion at the base of his head, along his whole shaft, slowly in and out; nothing seemed stimulating enough for him.

-Overall-

The Monkey Spanker Vibro is a fairly affordable stroker (others out there are comparable in price and better quality), but you definitely get what you pay for.  While the size and weight is appreciated, the lack of pleasure cancels out the positive aspects of it.  If you respond to focused strokes and enjoy very light vibrations, this might work out for you, but I don’t see this being something the majority of people will find more stimulating than their own hand or their partner’s.

If this looks like something you’d enjoy, you can purchase directly from the Monkey Spanker website by clicking the banner below.

monkey-spanker

The Monkey Spanker Vibro was provided to me free of charge in exchange for an unbiased review.  This is in compliance with FTC guidelines.

  One Response to “Review: Monkey Spanker Vibro”

  1. Sorry to hear that you guys did not enjoy this spanker too much.

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